when the chips are down...

So i've been on the running wagon for about 5 weeks.  I could look it up on a calendar and get you the date but do you really have to know at this exact minute how long i've been wheezing around my neighborhood?  Also, I have fought the future as long as possible.  Stayed away from "gadget phones" and cool tech stuff.  What i'm alluding to here is I don't have a google calendar with every bowel movement and twitter post scheduled for 2 months straight.  So if you really wanted to know the date i would have to look up the Warrior Dash and reverse math it from there.  Detective work.  Old School!

Where was I even going with this.... Oh yeah!  So I also have quit smoking due to, in no small part, the training and running.  I got fed up and angry with not being able to make progress.  So I stopped.  18 days ago?   Sounds right.  Anyway, my point is i had to get out of my lazy ass comfort zone and get a little riled up and the quitting was... i almost hesitate to say it... easy.  I hope i'm not cursing myself here.  I feel motivation is the key to sticking with anything.  If i continue to run and do races and events then i'll want to keep pushing myself.  So it turns out that running might be my anti-smoking program.  Great.  Now i'll always be running somewhere...

So tonight's run (i run early morning or very late at night) brought something to the very front of my fury.  I got home from work and it's too hot (today was about a hundred degrees) to do anything so i cooled off in the pool (nice!) then had an admittedly too large dinner then took a little nap to prepare for my night's run.  I wake up ravenous and begin to systematically seek out and devour any and all salty chip or cracker in our kitchen.  Crap.  I have to run in an hour!  Take a couple tums and drink a bunch of water.  That will do the trick!  Or it will make you want to vomit for 2 of the 4 miles you ran in the hot humid bayou-esqe climate.

I got home and was mad.  Very mad.  I decided that this kind of thing is what i've been using for motivation so...   No more salty chips on any kind of regular basis.  The occasional tailgate party?  Have at it but with some restraint!  Salt is my biggest addiction.  Time to cut it loose.

I'm saying it out loud.  Chips not welcome here.

5K for fun? Oh hell no...

I've done my share of little races and 5K's and I have NEVER tried to finnish with any kind velocity or real pace.  That has never bothered me even in the slightest.  Until now.

Tomorrow morning I'm doing a 5k that i signed up for before i "transformed" into a runner and i am planing on CRUSHING it!  I mean come on!  I've already run 3 5K's this week!

This will be my first attempt at not finishing in the back of the pack.  There will be the normal front runners who will scorch the 3.2 miles then run home to continue the work out they need to get to be a considered a real run.  I used to (and apparently still do!) really dislike these guys and gals who grace the race with their presence only to then embarrass everyone (ok... me) then vanish into the misty morning clad in spandex.  I mean i really hated these people... Now i get it... at least a little bit.  I am certainly going to try and crush everyone at the charity event tomorrow.  I am my own arch enemy!  Great.

 

Day 11

I have been eleven days smoke free.  I almost can't believe it myself.  Actually no.  I can't believe it at all.  I really had decided that i would probably smoke forever in some capacity.  Now don't get me wrong, I'm not getting all cocky and bad ass saying I kicked smokings ass!  No... more like I have this plan and up until 11 days ago smoking wasn't interfering with it.  Once I realized that it was preventing me from reaching my goals i got angry.  I have been ashamed of my cigarette habit for years but it wasn't until i got mad that something was going to happen.

Spirits are high and breathing is better.  Baby steps.